It is never easy losing a loved one. You are faced with the permanence of their absence. They are gone forever and thinking about that alone is enough to put you down in the depth of sadness. People come up with so many ideas on how you can cope but many are not helpful because they don’t understand how you feel or they undermine your emotions. Here are some tips to help you cope better with the loss of your loved one;
Accept that it’s okay to grieve
You don’t have to be strong or listen to the advice of people telling you not to cry so much. Grieving is natural and should not be placed in a box where you are told when and how to go about it. You should cry as much as you want to. Allow yourself to grieve in whatever manner you want to. Letting go of all the pent-up emotions is going to aid your healing in the long run. Grieving only becomes a problem when it becomes permanent and you should seek help if that happens.
Don’t try to delete memories
After losing a loved one, having physical memories of them around you may bring moments of sadness and you may think getting rid of such things will be a solution. However, this may create an opposite result as you may experience an after feeling of emptiness. Instead, you can embrace these memories and relish them. You should let them signify that your loved one will always be with you. You may also find that you may regret getting rid of these things after some time has passed.
Don’t shut out friends and family
Your loved one is dead and gone but your family and friends who are alive are still here for you. Don’t shut them out. Let them know how they can help you feel better or if you just need their presence alone. However, you should speak up if anyone’s advice or presence is making things worse for you. Don’t feel selfish or impolite for expressing your feelings about them.
Don’t try to block out your pain
Denying that you are feeling pain won’t make it go away. It may below the surface temporarily but when it comes back up, you may not be able to cope with it. Therefore, don’t drown yourself in negative distracting activities such as excessive drinking, smoking and partying just to block out the pain you feel from having lost your loved one. You will be doing yourself greater harm in the long run. Instead of blocking out your, walk through it by going over your emotions. Invest yourself in activities that you shared with your loved one. You can also help live out their uncompleted dreams.
Overall, you need to realize that healing from the loss of a loved one takes a different path for everyone. You should not rush your grieving but you should be honest enough to accept when it is beyond your control.